Sex awards

Let’s say you hold a contest for performance in bed. And in your contest the yardstick isn’t actual prowess beneath the sheets but good looks.

Now that would be quite a logical thing to do provided (a) you could define and compare ‘performance’; (b) you know exactly how performance depends on looks; and (c) you can also define and compare ‘looks’.

For the second condition to hold all your judges should go to bed with all your contestants, in some sort of round-ribbon contest.

Immoral? Maybe. Absurd? Probably. Worthwhile? Almost certainly not.

Yet we hold ad and DM award contests every second weekend. “Wait a moment,” you say, “How dare you compare hypothetical judges of a ridiculous contest with industry experts evaluating the year’s best work?”

It’s admittedly irreverent, yet, aside from that, are the two situations that different?